Friday, April 1, 2011

AMC Hires New (Old) Writers!

In an effort to keep the sinking ship of AMC afloat, ABC has sent the current headwriters David Kreizman and Donna Swajeski packing after less than a year of aired material.  Sighting the destruction of Bianca and Reese's marriage, the less than stellar rehash of the classic "Tad sleeps with Marian and Liza" storyline with Liza, Colby and Damon, and the launching of yet another baby switch storyline, among other things, a spokesperson for ABC said, "enough is enough!"   So they've pinned their hopes on the rehiring of two of the worst writers that AMC has ever employed.  Teaming up for the first time ever are Charles Pratt and Megan McTavish, effective immediately.  Pratt's immediate plan is to make Bianca heterosexual, explaining away her lesbianism as a "phase."  When asked to comment Mr. Pratt was heard to have said, "Who's Bianca again?"  

Meanwhile Ms. McTavish, succeeded in making Tad, one of the most beloved characters in AMC history, a murderer back in 2006.  And not just a murderer, a sadistic murderer who buried his victim alive.  Her plans are to move Tad along into serial killer territory when it's revealed that it was Tad all along who was the actual Satin Slayer, not Alexander Cambias.  So it was Tad who killed Dixie!  In addition it will be revealed that Tad killed Julia because he knew she was trying to adopt his daughter.  He killed Zach just for kicks and giggles.  And a little birdie even tells me that Aidan never really left Pine Valley at all, but his body is stashed in Tad's man cave and when things get tough he heads down there to confide his problems to his bestest buddy, Fish 'n Chips, who literally smells worse than fish now.  Hey maybe Dixie's down there too.  Before all is said and done, Tad's basement will have more bodies stashed in it than the Martin attic.  

Best of luck to these two um, stellar scribes.

19 comments:

Casandra said...

Haha April Fools! You almost had me for a second. Too bad the part about the head writers now being fired isn't true!

Jeannette1005 said...

So now I know why I took AMC completely out of my DVR list. Why don't they just cancel the damn show already and put us out of our misery.

Jeannette1005 said...

You guys are mean. Great April's Fool joke. The sad part is how quickly we (me) believed it to be true since I have no faith in the idiot PTB

Unknown said...

great joke. if bianca ever went straight, i dont know what i would do with myself.

Marsha @ Tattered Chick said...

Ha ha ha, you sure had me until the Tad serial killer . . . . . too funny!

Lauren said...

It would certainly be more interesting than what's going on now --

Plager said...

Too bad the current writers aren't really being fired! You nailed it on the head about the rehashing of the OLD, OLD story lines. Yuck!

Unknown said...

Last year you decided to quit this blog. You had me with that one. Not today, I was ready for you!!

David said...

OMG! I completely fell for it until I read that Bianca would be straight. I wouldn't mind Megan McTavish and Lorraine Broderick teaming up as co-headwriters, because they know the show's history better than anyone...other than Agnes Nixon herself!

Shadow said...

You know, the way things are going this isn't so unbelievable.

kimbutgar said...

Boy the part about Tad being a serial killer got me for a moment and then I realized that this was April Fools day. Good one!

Unknown said...

April Fools!
The headline had me for a split second. Congrats ona good one.

JackieBD said...

Thanks for almost ruining my day! I actually believed the Pratt story then... dawn broke over Marblehead... Thanks for the comic relief - just a tinge of sadness because of the ring of truth to the absurdity.

sonja said...

Yeah, you had me until Bianca went straight. Good one!

From Pratt Falls: "There are lesbians on our show?"

NuttyAboutSoaps said...

Thankfully, I knew this was an April's Fool joke..... otherwise, the thought of Bianca "turning straight" might have pushed me over the edge.

On a sadder note, the cancellation rumors are now getting mentioned by reputable sites:

http://www.tvguide.com/News/ABC-Cancel-Children-1031345.aspx

Something tells me this one is real - they just haven't gotten the replacement shows ready yet.

:(

Unknown said...

I got my husband good last nite before 12am and he fell for it, he was so mad because he got me good about 3 yrs ago and would not let me get him thereafter, so I thought of getting him before the clock struck 12 and without thinking he fell for it. I loved it. hehehe

pamk said...

The Bianca story line, I like. The Tad story line--ridiculous! April Fools!

Cheyenne said...

That was at least a GOOD April Fool's joke unlike one I saw on Moviefone tonight concerning "Ghostbusters 3" For a second though my heart like sank when I read Pratt and McTrash were teaming up and I thought WHAT THE!? Then I kept reading and KNEW it was a gag.

JuliedP said...

You got me!